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Wish!! she hadn't looked back"

Aug 7, 2024

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“My name is Vijay, I live in a village called Sivaay” Vijay introduced himself to the trainer.

“That's all, when is your CA final exam? Tell me that too” the trainer said to Vijay.

“Actually, it's in November 2023, but I can't say if I will be able to give it” Vijay said humbly.

To attend the necessary 15 days of advanced IT training for his CA training, Vijay used to come to Jadhar city, 35 kilometers away from his village Sivaay, every day. Even if there was no training, he used to come to Jadhar city every day for his CA articleship training.

He was from a lower-class family. To contribute to the household expenses, he did his CA training like a job, which gave him a little more money, which he gave to the family for household expenses. Today is the first day of his 15-day advanced IT training during his CA course. He was sitting a little apart from the other children, it was not that he did not like to mingle with people, he was just afraid of making new friends.

It was 10:15, some children had not arrived yet. Out of a total of 22 children, only 16 were in the class.

Suddenly, "May I come in?" A girl with a small bag on her shoulder, in which barely two books could fit even if she tried hard, took permission from the trainer to come in and sat on the empty seat next to Vijay.

Vijay, who was busy watching the stock market on his phone, did not realize this until the girl (Arohi) asked him about the topics covered in the class before she arrived.

"Nothing much, till now madam has only taken our self-introduction, nothing special has been done." After saying this, Vijay again got busy with his phone.

Arohi, who was from a middle-class family, was a playful, clear-minded, open-hearted girl whose home was in Jadhar itself.

She was present on almost every social media platform.

As the class progressed, Arohi kept talking to Vijay on one topic or another, Vijay could not refuse to let her speak even if he did not want to, he would give brief answers to every long question of Arohi in two or three words. Then it was time for a 15-minute tea break, Arohi brought some fruits with her, she asked Vijay to eat some, Vijay hesitated a little at first then thinking that she would not feel bad, picked up a piece of apple and thanked Arohi and sat a little away from her. Today was the first time Vijay had talked so much to an unknown girl, it was not that Vijay did not talk to girls, but he wanted to focus on his career by staying away from these girls' circles so that he could take good care of his mother and sister, and he knew that if a girl came into his life, even if he didn't want to, he would get distracted from his career.

After some time, the class started again, Arohi was doing every task of the trainer with Vijay on his computer itself. That's why she would ask Vijay about her every doubt again and again, and even if  Vijay didn't want to, he would try to answer her questions with great love.

Vijay wanted to leave early to go to his articleship training because he got paid for every hour spent there, so he asked the training in-charge for permission to leave early, but the training in-charge refused him, so he again sat next to Arohi.

Now it was 3:30 pm, the training class was over, Vijay got up quickly and started looking for an auto, and he caught an auto and went towards his office.

Today, Vijay was very tired from the rush of coming from training to office and then home, so after eating food, he went to sleep,

But what happened!! that Vijay who used to get into a deep sleep within 5 minutes of laying onto bed, was not able to sleep today, he was just thinking about the things Arohi said all day, he started smiling just by thinking about her.

The Vijay who did not wanted to go for advanced IT training the first day thinking that his articleship training money would be deducted due to going there, was a little eager to go there today. As usual, he reached the training centre at 9:05 am, and there he was trading in the share market on his phone, slowly all the other children also came, and finally the one whose eyes Vijay was waiting for, Arohi. Vijay didn't expect it, but he wished that Arohi would sit next to him again today, and something similar happened, Arohi came and sat on the seat next to Vijay without looking here and there. She extended her hand to shake hands with Vijay, but Vijay refused to shake hands, it was Vijay's habit, he was hesitant to shake hands with any girl, Arohi felt a little bad but to tackle the situation, she joked about it. Today, two other girls (Aarti and Saleja) were also sitting on the other side of Vijay, Vijay would ask them something or the other when he didn't understand something, and soon Arohi also mingled with those two girls. Now Vijay, Saleja, Arohi and Aarti used to sit together every day. And every day after evening Vijay used to tell his co-workers with great joy about the daily routine that happened in training, especially the one related to Arohi, his colleagues also used to tease him for the name of Arohi coming on his tongue, and Vijay would also smile and love their teasing.

"Call Arohi once, she hasn't come yet, she usually comes by 10:30," Vijay said to Aarti with great urgency.

"Not picking up," Aarti said after calling once.

"You keep trying till she picks up," Vijay said with a sad heart.

And then he himself called Arohi 5-6 times, it was the first time in Vijay's life that he had called a girl without any work.

The day which used to seem like a moment for Vijay for the past 4-5 days, today every moment of his seemed equal to centuries, he did not even eat lunch, he just went to the roof of the training building and started thinking about Arohi, after a while Aarti and some other children also came upstairs.

Vijay's phone rang, he picked up the phone immediately.

"Where are you, are you okay, why haven't you come till now, will you come today or not, did something happen to you, why didn't you pick up the phone," Vijay asked so many questions in one breath. Today was the first time Vijay had called a girl in such manner.

"I'm fine, I'm at home, I was sunbathing and the phone was in the room so I didn't know, but who makes 24 calls, was there any important work," Arohi answered Vijay in her playful manner and asked another question.

"You're lying, you didn't pick up the phone on purpose and I was worried thinking what happened to you, maybe you got into an accident with a car somewhere and you stay online all day so you didn't see the phone," Vijay was saying whatever was coming to his mind, today his mind had lost control over his tongue.

He told Arohi a lot in an angry tone for a long time and then cut the phone himself in anger.

Today he had no interest in his training class, so he left early without telling the trainer. The conversation he had with Arohi kept going on in his mind all day. Now he was worried thinking what happened to him, how could he talk to a girl like this and started getting angry with himself.

In the morning, Vijay came and sat in his place in the training center first, slowly the other children also started coming.

As the children were coming, Vijay was getting a little worried, he was afraid that after the phone conversation with Arohi yesterday, Arohi might not sit with him, thinking this, his mind was sad.

Meanwhile, "Sorry madam, I am late," Arohi came inside, and as usual, she came and sat next to Vijay in her playful manner.

"What happened to you yesterday, who makes so many calls, you scared me," Arohi said to Vijay in a playful tone, turning towards him.

"Sorry," Vijay said, bowing his head, and started doing the work given by the trainer with Arohi in silence.

Arohi used to come and go by a private e-rickshaw, and Vijay's office was on the way to her house, today, for some reason, Vijay insisted on going with Arohi in her rickshaw, and Arohi could not refuse him. So today after training, Vijay left with Arohi, his mind wanted to say a lot but he was silent thinking what and how to say. "Do you have a dowry custom there?" Vijay asked suddenly without thinking.

"Yes, but why are you asking?" Arohi asked Vijay surprised, not expecting such a question.

"Just like that, and how much dowry will your parents give if you get married?" Today Vijay was asking what he himself could not understand, he was just asking whatever was coming to his mind.

"I don't know, but what will you do knowing?" Arohi couldn't give a correct answer to Vijay's strange question.

"I will find a boy for you, zero dowry, seeing your playful face and intelligence, I can say that  you will have a royal life ahead." Vijay said without thinking.

Vijay's office came in between, and he walked towards his office, gazing at Arohi with a smile. For the first time, Arohi saw Vijay in this form, but she didn't like it, she was a little upset with Vijay's words. But despite all this, Vijay's words had left many questions in her mind. Finding answers to these questions was more difficult for Arohi because she couldn't even understand those questions yet. Today, Vijay was also asking himself questions about the questions he asked Arohi, how could he ask a girl like this, and he was ashamed of himself.

Next day, during lunch, almost all the training students went to the park to take a walk, except Vijay and two or three other boys.

When Vijay did not find Arohi after looking here and there, he asked another boy about Arohi, the boy told him that Arohi had also gone to the park with the other children.

Vijay also walked towards the park without thinking.

Seeing Vijay coming towards the park, Arohi ran towards him and stopped very close to him. She couldn't understand herself why her feet were walking towards Vijay, she felt good to be so close to him, but she felt a little shy in front of so many children, so she turned her neck to the other side and walked away without saying anything to Vijay.

Nobody could understand what happened, Vijay couldn't understand anything after seeing her come so close to him and murmur.

Even Arohi herself was disturbed thinking what happened to her, how could she become so restless like this, what was the reason for her running towards Vijay, but due to her playful nature, she ignored her thoughts after thinking for a while. On the other hand, Vijay had already fallen in love with Arohi in his heart, but he himself was unaware of this, Arohi's murmuring near him was making him realize that Arohi had love for him in her heart. But Vijay also knew that there was no future for him and Arohi, so he wanted to stay away from Arohi now, he did not want Arohi to be troubled because of him.

"Arohi and Vijay, you both should work on separate computers," trainer Sanjay said to Vijay and Arohi in a strict voice.

"Okay sir," Vijay replied in agreement and started working on a separate computer from Arohi.

"Vijay, keep telling me as you do it," Arohi said to Vijay with a smile.

"Do it yourself, you know everything, don't do this drama," Vijay said with a little bitterness in his voice, no one had imagined such harsh words from his tongue, everyone was looking at Vijay. Arohi's smiling face suddenly withered.

"Vijay, a little softly," Aarti, who was sitting next to Vijay, said to Vijay explaining.

"Arohi, if you don't understand something, come and sit with us, I will tell you," said a boy named Ranjit who was sitting a little distance away, lovingly to Arohi.

"Thank you, but I will sit with Vijay," Arohi said to Ranjit with a fake smile.

Vijay, who was himself hurt by his own words, was crying inside by Arohi's words, but he could not tell anyone the state of his mind. He silently completed every project of Arohi with her, but during that time he did not try to talk to Arohi even once.

Today Vijay was crying in his mind all day, and these tears flowed from his eyes like the calm light of the Ganges at night. In today's world, where people do not regret even after rebuking others, he was so disturbed by just a few harsh words, the fault lies not in the words but in the emotions, the emotions with which words are being said and the circumstances in which they are being said determines the pain from those words. On the other hand, Arohi was also entangled in finding her mistake in her mind, she could not understand what happened suddenly, she was more saddened by the insult in front of everyone than the fact that the insult was done by the man she loved, whom she loved what? This question kept coming to her mind again and again, after all, why did she feel so helpless in front of Vijay, why couldn't she answer him back, why did she feel sad if someone said something to Vijay. Just these why's kept eating away at her mind, she knew the answer but couldn't make herself understand that reason.

"I can't do it, you call her, won't she come today, and don't tell her that I asked you to call," Vijay said to Aarti.

"You don't talk to her properly, but you are worried like this," Aarti said.

" If You don't have to call do not do but  just don't think or say anything like that," Vijay said, interrupting Aarti's sentence.

"Okay, now I won't call her," Aarti said making a fake angry face.

Meanwhile, Arohi was seen coming from outside, Vijay's face seemed to be shining with the best happiness of the century. Then today again Arohi thought something for a moment and then extended her hand towards Vijay to shake hands, but Vijay refused by saying hello, the atmosphere became tense again, but then Arohi said hello to him with a smile and sat next to him, her mind was sad but the sadness that is seen also causes trouble to loved ones, just thinking this, Arohi kept smiling.

Today again, around noon, almost all the children went towards the park, except Vijay and some children. A girl named Seerat was also training with them, she did not go to the park and always used to sit alone and talk the least. Vijay did not like anyone staying alone, so when he saw her alone, he started asking her to go to the park, after repeated requests from Vijay, the girl agreed to go to the park. But Vijay went to the same park with that girl where Arohi and other students were. But what happened, seeing Vijay with Seerat, Arohi's mind was disturbed, a pain was rising in her mind, whose reason she knew but was not ready to accept. Now we should go, Arohi said to the other students, she could not bear to see Vijay with another girl, it was a small thing to say, but when you are in those circumstances, you can only know that these small things are also like a sharp weapon to hurt a person's heart.

Amidst all this, one thing happened that Seerat had also fallen in love with Vijay, she talked to him the most and wanted to spend maximum time with him, Vijay had no attachment to Seerat but did not want to hurt Seerat, so he always kept himself present for her. Vijay also knew that Seerat had started liking him, but Vijay had no interest in Seerat and did not want to hurt her, so he just thought that it was a matter of a few days, he would not say anything to Seerat.

"How strange it is Arohi, we cannot be with the one we love, and we do not want to be with the one who loves us," Vijay said this to Arohi thinking about Arohi and Seerat. Arohi was not ready for these things, she could not understand what to say, she thought that maybe Vijay has realized that she has fallen in love with him but Vijay loves someone else and maybe that's why Vijay is talking rudely to her. Thinking this, Arohi just nodded in agreement and sat silently.

Now there were only two days left for the training to end. Thinking about this, Vijay's eyes were getting wet, would he be able to meet Arohi again? The Advance IT Training for which, Vijay used to renuke the ICAI institution for being compulsory, today the same training was writing the most beautiful moments of his life.

Next day Vijay did not eat lunch, he went straight to the roof of the building, he liked the sight from there and he felt peace there. Suddenly Arohi arrived on the roof with one of her friends, seeing Vijay (who was on the roof of the other building), her steps started moving towards him quickly, she crossed a small but dangerous circle in between and stopped very close to Vijay, today again her feet were not under her control.

"You are crazy." Vijay said angrily to Arohi.

Why did he say this, everyone understood it but no one was saying anything.

"Go go and look down from the edge of the roof, you will like it," Vijay said, changing the topic in a fake funny way.

"You think I look stupid," Arohi said laughing.

Then she turned and started to leave quickly, while coming, her steps had crossed every circle because she was focused on Vijay, but now while leaving, Arohi could not cross that small circle.

That place between the roofs of the two buildings was a little dangerous, Vijay scolded Arohi to step back and then stood on the dangerous turn himself and told Arohi to cross the wall. Arohi kept one hand on the wall and one hand on Vijay's chest close to her heart, and crossed the wall and without looking here and there, went downstairs. That hand placed by Arohi still gives Vijay the feeling of being close to him today.

Today is the last day of training, Vijay sat with Arohi in the training room all day without saying anything with a fake smile on his face, he felt that if he tried to talk to Arohi even a little, he might not be able to stop himself today. That's why he just kept looking at all day without saying anything.

"Okay, I'll leave now," Arohi said to someone on the phone.

Vijay was stunned to hear this, one last day and two more hours less from that. But he was helpless, what to say, even in his heart he knew that he and Arohi had no future, but how to convince the mind, it was not even under his control.

It was time for Arohi to leave, she was about to leave without looking at Vijay, maybe she thought Vijay would stop her for the last time, but Vijay was as if hiding his crying heart with a smiling face, he didn't even try to talk to Arohi or know the reason for her early departure. Seeing no reaction from Vijay, Arohi looked at him with wet eyes, she thought that Vijay might say something after seeing her, but Vijay was busy hiding his tearful face with a fake smile, or maybe he felt that if he said something, he wouldn't be able to control his emotions. Without getting any response from Vijay, Arohi walked away quickly. Maybe she never experienced such emotional pains in her life, now she didn't want to feel that pain again, so she decided never to contact Vijay again.

Arohi had gone away but Vijay was still unable to remove the sight of her leaving from his eyes.

"I wish she hadn't looked back” Vijay said these words to himself and got lost into her memories.

 

2nd part OF Story is on WAY


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